Why am I struggling with food?
Why do I think about eating, weight or my body so much?
Can I ever have a normal relationship with food?
How do I learn to trust my body again?
These are questions we hear regularly at MTC. If food, eating or your body has become a source of worry, guilt or control, you may be experiencing what we call eating distress or eating disorders.
We don’t believe people are “disordered”. We believe people can experience eating distress, distress that is eating them. There is an important difference.
It can feel as though food has taken over your thoughts and is stopping you from enjoying life, but there is a way forward. Recovery from these conditions is possible, and it is about much more than food.
You may have asked yourself this question many times.
Why do I think about food so much?
Why can’t I just eat normally?
Why do I keep worrying about my weight?
Why is it so difficult to trust my body?
And perhaps the most frustrating question of all:
“Why can’t I just stop?”
If you have ever felt this way, you are certainly not alone. We have worked with thousands of people experiencing eating distress/eating disorders over many years. One thing we have learned is that it is rarely just about food only. Food may be where the struggle shows itself, but there can be much more underneath.
Perhaps you are anxious, overwhelmed, lonely, exhausted or trying very hard to be in control, or you have become disconnected from your body and no longer know what hunger, fullness or satisfaction actually feel like. Or perhaps you have spent years listening to messages telling you what your body should look like, what you should eat and how much you should weigh.
No wonder trusting yourself can become difficult, but you are not your eating difficulties. Your eating challenges are something you are experiencing. They are not who you are.
And if something has been learned, it can also be unlearned.
Recovery is not about becoming perfect around food. It is not about following another set of strict rules or spending the rest of your life worrying about what you eat. Recovery is about getting your life back.
It might begin with eating something without guilt. Then perhaps going out for a meal without anxiety taking over. Maybe you stop checking your body so often. Maybe you begin listening to your hunger instead of another rule in your head.
Slowly, you start making choices based on what you need rather than what fear tells you to do and something very important happens. You begin to trust yourself again, but learning to trust takes time
We cannot expect someone who has spent years criticising, controlling or ignoring their body to suddenly trust it overnight. Trust is built through experience.
A little listening, some patience, top up with curiosity, and then doing it again.
This is why the process of recovery is not simply about food. It is about developing a better relationship with yourself, your emotions, your body, your thoughts and your choices. It is developing different relationship with your life.
At MTC, we have never believed that recovery should be reduced to a number on a scale. We are interested in the person behind the eating difficulties and in helping people develop the understanding and skills they need to move forward.
You don’t have to spend the rest of your life fighting with food. There can come a time when food becomes food again.
Your body becomes your body again, and your mind has space for the things that really matter to you.
Recovery is possible and sometimes the first step is simply becoming curious about what is really going on.
If you are struggling with food, eating, body image or the thoughts and emotions surrounding them, you can find out more about our approach at MTC.
