Written by ‘N’
I never really thought much about the meaning of the word “Peace” before this week. Of course I had used the word plenty of times in the past but I think I associated it with quiet places or scenic settings! Peacefulness only existed outside of me! Like so many other areas of my life it was conditional!
But as I sit here now, I wonder if maybe this little word “peace” has another meaning altogether! I am not sure that feeling true peace has anything to do with external factors at all really! Because I am sure that I have felt it even when the world around me was loud and busy! But I am also sure that despite being in calm and pleasant surroundings, the last thing I was experiencing was peace!
And so, this makes me wonder, if true peace can only really come from within a person?! (And I think the answer is here is definitely yes!) I wonder then, if this is so, how is it that I have I managed to arrive at a point in my life where I can feel it? Because I think I have been feeling true peace for the first time in a long time! Maybe even for the first time in forever! And it feels wonderful and amazing and it makes me want to feel it even more!
So I thought that maybe, if I spent a little time exploring it in this blog, I would be able to continue to practice every day so that I can create even more peaceful moments for me to enjoy…..!!
So now I will ask myself what have I been doing to create a more peaceful me???
Hmmm…let me see!!
Each day I practice:
- Letting the judgement go-Judgement of my words and my actions are not helpful or necessary ever!
- Stopping the overanalysing of my words and my actions and those of others-This is also unhelpful and definitely not necessary either!
- Looking out for the positivity in my day-what is the point in going back over all of the things I could have or should have done differently?! I can just learn from each situation and forget about it!
- Gratitude-There is no point in wishing things were different! There is always something or somebody for me to be grateful for!
- Changing the negative thoughts about myself and others and situations into more positive ones– Negativity only causes heaviness and these days I much prefer to feel lightness!
- Speaking to myself kindly-I deserve kindness!
- Connecting with nature-I make time to go for a walk by the sea or through the trees! I choose to take a few moments to notice the sky or the flowers! Sometimes all I need is this connection to bring in the lightness!
- Connecting with other people-I practice really listening to others, I notice the pleasant things they say and do! I look them in the eyes, I smile and I laugh! I hear the kind words they say to me and I tell myself these words are true!
- Nourishing my body-It is not possible to feel peace when I am hungry!
- Deep breathing-a few deep breaths can definitely help to calm it all down!
- Putting my shoulders back and holding my head up high-Instantly I feel lighter when I do this!
- Seeing my self-worth-I am worthy and wonderful and amazing just because I am me!
As I sit here now and read back over my list there is one thing that I notice! I see now that I have been learning to practice all of this since I came to Marino and began my journey to recovery and freedom! I am quite sure that all the learning is finally coming together or maybe I have started to master it! And maybe that is the reason for the wonderful sense of peace that I am lucky enough to feel more frequently these days! And I feel grateful and blessed to be at this point and to have learned all of these amazing things! I feel very lucky to have met Marie and to have experienced all the wonderful teaching she has given me along the way! As I am fairly sure that I wouldn’t be sitting here today reflecting on my ability to feel inner peace if I hadn’t!! And I am also sure that I wouldn’t ever have known what it felt like to be at peace! And that would have been a very sad way to live my life! In fact it would have just been tragic!
I notice another thought enter my head…I am thinking now that maybe “Peace” is just another word for “Freedom”! And so maybe those wonderful times of contentment and stillness and warmth and wonderfulness that are becoming more frequent and longer for me, are what it feels like to be free! And I also realise that I have had these peaceful moments for a while now but I think that maybe I didn’t know what they were or maybe I was suspicious of them!? Or maybe I just didn’t appreciate them or cherish them or focus on them before!
But to be honest I was most likely too busy focusing on all the parts of recovery that were STILL there!!
So I think from now on I will not only continue to practice all of the above but I will also remind myself of what it feels like to be at peace! When everything is not so still and calm within me, I will remind myself, that there is another way to feel! That there is a far more pleasant way to be! And remind myself that I too can experience inner peace in all its amazingness!
And I’ll remind myself that I too can be free!