Healthy Relationship With Our Self

Written by Starlight

Our Recovery Class on Tuesday was about having a healthy relationship with ourselves and what exactly that means?

It was a class full of questions that left you thinking how can I develop/strengthen the relationship I have with myself? It was a great discussion of what a healthy relationship means to each person.

Some of the questions where:

* What does it mean to have a healthy relationship with myself?

* How would you describe the relationship you have with yourself?

* What does it means to love/respect myself?

* My current definition of respect for myself is to always treat myself with respect not just under certain conditions. I deserve to have a rest if I’m feeling tired, I don’t have to justify a rest by doing 100 million things beforehand. I deserve to nourish my body; I don’t have to do xyz beforehand. Respect for me means always treating myself and my body with care and kindness without any terms and conditions attached.

* What do I want my purpose to be?

*  Do we want to be remembered as being the thinnest women/men in the world? Or do we want to be remembered for the person that we are and all the joy we brought to the world through our own uniqueness

It is important to value what we bring to each day. We may not see what an impact we have on people by just being yourself, so instead of trying to cure the world, start with you and be an inspiration of Freedom!

A healthy relationship has so many different levels, the physical, the mental and emotional and spiritual. The way we treat our bodies, the internal dialogue and our self-talk and how we treat and react to our emotions and sensitivity.

Relationships, whether with ourselves, friends or partners is going to be complex topic with lots of different areas popping up. So what does it mean to have a healthy relationship?

  1. Well in a relationship with another person, honest and open communication is key. Therefore why should it be any different with the relationship with ourselves? It was suggested to start to talk to individual body parts everyday ad open up the conversation with your body! E.g.

* ‘Thank you to my arms for allowing me to hug, drive, put on nice moisturiser and get dressed and make my breakfast every morning! ‘

* ‘Thank you to my legs for allowing me to hop out of bed, wear funky shoes, get me where I need to go and drive’

* ‘Thank you to my heart for never giving up on me and always pumping blood and nutrients around my body to make sure I stay alive’

It was mentioned to the class that if you had a friend and hadn’t talked to them in months then it wouldn’t be a very good relationship due to lack of communication therefore we need to constantly have this communication with our body to strengthen and improve our relationship. The way I see it is I can’t get rid of my body like I can to a person I don’t want to talk to any more so we might as well be mates lol

  1. Something I learned myself recently, about respecting my mental and emotional state was maybe sometimes saying no to things .e.g. meeting up with people you know are not good for you! People need to deserve my time. I need to demand respect from people and not just flock to whoever is willing to show me a bit of love and affection.

Doing something for myself now and being grateful, stronger and proud of myself later!

‘Do something now your future self will thank you for’

Not basing my opinion of myself on what others think of me, we are all unique human beings and no one in the history of the world can bring to this day what we can. We are authentic and beautiful and that’s just it. We are humans and all deserve to be treated nicely and with respect from our self and from others.

Be your own supporter! As one freedom fighter mentioned ‘You always have yourself’ .

Without sounding cynical we are born into this world by our self, yes we have people around us, maybe a good family and friends, but sometimes they’re not always there for you the way you would like them to be. But do you know who is? YOU! ‘I am my only constant’. At some point you just need to leave the destructive self-talk behind, put on your big girl/boy trousers and be your own supporter. Rely on yourself:)  I remember that sounding so scary and I feared it would mean no one would care about me anymore but now I feel empowered by the fact I am in charge of my life, I don’t need permission/advice from anyone else on how to live it.

More tips for developing a healthy relationship were:

* To right down your learning everyday of what works and what doesn’t work for you.

* Find comfort in other things than food- such as a book, having a bath, a nice stroll, take pictures of nature, rest or see a movie. The list is endless.

There was lots more wisdom discussed but that is my summary 🙂